Kyron Horman Missing: Kaine And Terri Horman Face Off In Family Court

Portland, Or– Following one of the largest organized search weekends on Sauvie Island since Kyron Horman, 8,was abducted from Skyline School on June 4, his step-mother and father squared off in family court. Kaine Horman, Kyron’s father, arrived with his attorney, Laura Rackner.

Kaine’s estranged wife Terri Horman, arrived with her criminal defense attorney; Stephen Houze and her family law attorney Peter Bunch.

Mr. Horman appeared in a crisp-white dress shirt and tie, and Ms. Moulton-Horman wore an eggplant hued suit with a long skirt.

Cameras were banned in the downtown Multnomah County courtroom; however, there were apparently several hidden “nests” as the tweets were flying real-time.

Peter Bunch, counsel to Terri Horman, is adamant his client is the subject of more than one criminal investigation:

“The state has the ability to obtain every single bit of information that is produced in this case and that is outside the bounds of what it could do were this proceeding not occurring,” Bunch said in court.

“It is fundamentally unfair for Kitty (Kiara) and for Miss Horman for me to be hamstrung in the divorce case for the information I have compared to what they have.” “The publicity that’s going on is not being driven by Ms. Horman, it’s being driven by Mr. Horman, when he tells national media there’s no doubt Ms. Horman is involved.” “If Mr. Horman is really interested in what‘s best for the child, then Mr. Horman wouldn’t object to any visitation by this child’s mother.” “We’ll concede, Mr. Horman can have the house, right now. Mrs. Horman is going to lose money…”

Terri Horman has not been declared a suspect in either Kyron Horman’s disappearance or the alleged murder for hire plot against Kaine Horman. She is however, seeking access to all of her 911 calls dating back to the DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS.

While this timeline coincides with accusations by Kaine Horman in his filings that Terri attempted to arrange to have him murdered, this is the first public revelation of that call. Bunch went on to say that Rackner and Kaine Horman, who are parties to case sensitive criminal investigation materials involving Terri, are at a supreme advantage to his client who should only be expected to plead her protections under the 5th amendment as a result.

After heated debate by those sides, we learned: Rudy Sanchez, the infamous landscaper/hitman for hire, has an alias, and has eluded service in the civil matter to date, although he appears to have cooperated. Bunch proclaims Sanchez is unlocatable as a result of MCSO unwillingness to share discovery of a witness in the civil case ( blink holds hands over eyes).

Michael Cook, a/k/a sexter king, waited all afternoon via subpoena by Rackner, but was only interviewed by the press. He states he cut ties with both Terri and Kaine days before he was outed for invasive scapular intrusions. No word on that healing process.

Terri Horman had her own personal black Friday this year.

She called 911 THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS. Regular contributors and readers of blinkoncrime.com doubt she had sale flyer questions.

Judge Keith Meisenheimer, was sensitive to Kaine and Kyron’s ‘round the clock nightmare, but feels some time may allow things to shake out. January 6, 2011 to be exact.

Following this afternoon’s legal melee, blinkoncrime.com Editor In Chief asked prominent Washington State Family Law Attorney, Lea Conner, to weigh in:

Although I preface my comments with the fact that I practice family law in Washington State and not in Oregon, I am an Oregon native that has followed this case closely.

I’m a bit perplexed by Peter Bunch’s reasoning that if the court were to abate the dissolution, he would respond by filing a motion to modify the restraining order so that Terri Horman could have visitation with the parties’ daughter. Essentially, Mr. Bunch is arguing that the abatement would prejudice his client’s ability to parent her child. My understanding of the Multnomah County local rules is that an abatement means that the entire case is halted. Neither party can bring a motion before the court, nor can the court hear argument or make any ruling on motions.

It was also interesting to hear Mr. Bunch argue that proceeding with the divorce would violate Ms. Horman’s right against self-incrimination in the disappearance of her stepson. This is the first time that Terri Horman has publicly acknowledged any self-incrimination issues. In her motion for abatement, Ms. Horman, through counsel, argued that the ongoing investigation into Kyron Horman’s disappearance had made it “virtually impossible…to proceed with divorce-related issues in an effective an[d] orderly fashion[.]” Were Mr. Bunch to bring a motion to allow visitation, Mr. Horman would no doubt argue that Ms. Horman’s actions demonstrate that Ms Horman or someone she knew was responsible for Kyron Horman’s disappearance, and that her behavior since Kyron’s disappearance shows that she is unstable and poses a threat to their daughter’s safety.

I do not believe Mr. Horman would raise Ms. Horman’s 2005 convictions for DUI and reckless endangerment, as not only later chose to have a child with Ms. Horman since that time, he also left both of his children in her care for extended periods while he was at work. Under those facts, it would be hard to conclude that Mr. Horman believed Ms. Horman posed a threat to their daughter. The judge’s comment that “[e]ventually, Terri will have to decide whether or not to plead the fifth, regardless of the timing of the proceedings,” seems to indicate that the judge may not be willing to hold the action in abatement past the January 6, 2011, hearing.

I’m also interested in Mr. Bunch’s comment that “Rudy Sanchez” is an alias. If that’s true, then what is Rudy Sanchez’ real name, and how exactly did he first come in contact with Terri Horman?

It was also strange to learn that Michael Cook was subpoenaed to testify at the hearing. I’m curious if there were others scheduled to testify as well. I cannot speak to how the Oregon court operates in practice. However, I note that each party provided written affidavits in support of their respective motions.

Is there some reason that Mr. Cook’s statement could only be presented in oral testimony?

I’m not sure I understand Mr. Bunch’s logic in saying “If this is not abated we will not get reciprocal discovery.”

The state is not a party to a dissolution action. In a dissolution action, the parties can seek discovery from each other, and depending on the court rules, from third parties as well.

I’m not sure why Mr. Bunch would have the impression that there would be reciprocal discovery with a third party in a dissolution action, especially when that third party is law enforcement.

There’s a disconnect between Mr. Bunch’s argument that Ms. Horman cannot defend herself because she would incriminate herself in the disappearance of her stepson, and his statement that “If Mr. Horman is really interested in what‘s best for the child, then Mr. Horman wouldn’t object to any visitation by this child’s mother.”

The apparent logic is that Ms. Horman admits that if she speaks, she will incriminate herself in some as-yet-to-be-named crime related to Kyron’s disappearance, yet Mr. Horman is now supposed to trust her to care for his other child, because that’s so obviously in their daughter’s best interest.

Check back to blinkoncrime.com for updates.

Madeline Tanner, contributor and copy editor, www.blinkoncrime.com

Lea Connor, Esq., legal analyst, www.blinkoncrime.com

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1,553 Comments

  1. Madilu says:

    @LinTN says:
    October 27, 2010 at 1:41 pm

    Thanks for your input. You bring up some valid points.

  2. Madilu says:

    I do think that MC was a fox goading her into it, working for KH…and that she was prolly drunk when she texted that stuff. And although I was grossed out at first cuz I am so naive, I guess, nothing much more to say about it really. She has issues, and reading this stuff, I feel like a peeper -I feel sorry for her in the respect that her very dirty laundry is being exposed, but do think that it is necessary in order to protect baby.

    As far as those pointing out discrepancies in what KH stated in his affidavit and what he has said before, I believe that he was cautious at first, not wanting to expose the real dirty stuff, for a number of reasons, least of which was to hope that she would talk. If you go back to the Ex Parte motion to restrict access to file (June 28), there was some language that, to me, demonstrates that KH and Rackner were uninterested and unwilling to expose certain intimate details:

    “The information contained in the pleadings filed with the Court may be potentially embarrassing for the parties or for family members.
    It is likely that if public access to this file is allowed, this information will be disseminated in the media. This may be financially and emotionally damaging to the parties.”

    “This is a private family matter that should not be disseminated by the press and there is no public policy served by allowing public access to these records. Such access may be embarrassing to the parties, damaging to the family, and disruptive to court proceedings.”

    I guess what I am saying is that as time goes on, priorities shift. And now that Kyron is still missing, and he is facing putting his daughter in a situation which may be unhealthy and unsafe for her (especially truly not knowing her present mental stability), then it is time to pull out all stops. Take no chances.

  3. Madilu says:

    Does anyone have a theory as to what she meant by the text, “I cant talk. Bugs n the house and danger if i go outside.”

    I get the bugs part, but what ‘danger’ do you think she perceived?

  4. Mother Hen says:

    LinTN,

    I really enjoyed your post and agree with so much of what you have said. Thank you. I am inching toward the middle again.

    IIRC, there are things that Kaine and his attorney wish not to have exposed because it could damage his career / ability to earn a living. The thing is, Terri seems to have lost her ability for certain. If we knew this information would Kaine become the next unofficial suspect? Can’t help but wonder.

    Sorry if I have a faulty memory here. Moo.

  5. Idahogal says:

    41.cd says:
    October 27, 2010 at 1:44 pm
    Idahogal says:
    October 27, 2010 at 12:43 pm

    While I think that TH’s sexting was pretty disgusting. I think that even teenagers sext each other, and it does not mean that they are sex addicts, psychologically impaired, or about to become employed by the sex industry.

    @cd- Fair enough. Shame on those teenagers, though. Seriously, as I said, I’m just speculating here as always. I don’t give a rat’s ass what she did or does unless there is some element of it that might help us figure out the what and the whom in Ky’s disappearance. I most certainly stretch too far sometimes, grasping at straws as it were. I just care about that little boy and want to find the truth.

  6. Tigi says:

    @cd says:
    October 27, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    While I think that TH’s sexting was pretty disgusting. I think that even teenagers sext each other, and it does not mean that they are sex addicts, psychologically impaired, or about to become employed by the sex industry.
    ——————————–
    I don’t think most people judge her harshly merely because she sexted. I think it’s because of the circumstances under which she did so. Here stepson had recently gone missing, and was understood to be in danger if not dead, and her husband had just left her with their daughter. She was discussing her lawyer, and in a limited way, her situation as a suspect in the disappearance of her stepson, an innocent boy, in the same conversation in which she was sexting.

  7. Rich M says:

    Re: The notion of KH being controlling or potentially out of control:

    It seems to me that by now he’s just pissed. I wouldn’t blame him. I really don’t think he could give a crap about TMH anymore to be jealous. If my spouse was saying and doing the things TMH was doing, so soon after Kyron being taken, I too would wonder if that person was mentally ill or deranged. No doubt about it. And that would not make me controlling to want to keep such a sick person from a child.

    I am wondering if a hair sample drug test would reveal whether Terri was drugging Kiara at all. Does anyone know if those tests reveal things like OTC drugs? (Just an odd thought I was having).

  8. Rich M says:

    @Puzzled: Regarding “all about Kyron” and KH initial statements to that effect-given what has gone on since making those statements and the fact that now the divorce proceedings have not illuminated anything with regards to TMHs whereabouts and actions, I am guessing he just had to go head on at her and be done with it.

    To me it seems all about Kiara and protecting her at this point.

    Does anyone have a link to the latest court documents? (Sorry again if they have been posted already)

  9. Idahogal says:

    FWIW, just so I’m clear here, I understand that KH is trying to protect his daughter, and put pressure on TH, however I don’t for one minute think making those sexts public was a good idea, because it is not going to make her talk. Further, I absolutely think doing so is hurtful for James, and eventually Kiara. Someday all of this will have to be explained to her. The whole think is just tragic, and I fear it is just going to get uglier. It is just horrible all the way around, and my biggest concern is for the children involved, and how all of this eventually affects them. None of the kids of any of these adults deserves any of this. It is my opinion that part of being a parent is setting a good example and being a good role model for your children. In my book, that does not include sexting for teenagers or adults, that’s just the way I roll.

  10. Rich M says:

    Riverpearl on alcoholism: You spelled that out perfectly. Master manipulators and it is NEVER their fault.

    I would wager that Kaine or most hot blooded males would be delighted to have a woman who is a sex addict (should that be the addiction de jour.) It is probably fun for them to get it when they want it. Right up until they realize that the woman cannot help herself and get it from anyone she can.

    I do want to say to Idahogal, congrats on your continued sobriety. I have always enjoyed your posts and respected your POV.

    An odd and somewhat ugly thought….anyone else besides me wonder if TMH masturbating was a picture taken by DDS when she was hanging out in the house?

  11. Dee says:

    It appears that LE has found Zahra Baker’s prosthetic leg and her mattress which they are testing for DNA evidence. In this case LE was dealing with a lag time of about two weeks compared to Kyron’s 7 hours yet they have moved very quickly and are seeing some success. I am wondering why it has been so difficult in Kyron’s case. Perhaps because he disappeared from a school with hundreds of people rather than a home with only two. Also perhaps because Terri is smarter than the uneducated Bakers and also because Terri’s tie-ins with other groups has made this case more complex. I don’t know the answer but I so wish that we could see some tangible success in this case. I would at least like to know if he is alive. It is torture not knowing. LE knew right from the start that Zahra was dead. Perhaps this allowed them to focus better. Please bring Kyron home!

  12. puzzled says:

    puzzled says:
    October 27, 2010 at 4:22 pm

    … that leaves Kaine as being the one making these documents a part of the public domain.

    “`
    I was wrong to state this in this way .. Kaine did not personally release the sexting exhibits .. they were a part of his filing with the affidavit.

  13. loreli48 says:

    Terri has never known what to do with her life. Marriage didn’t work. Bodybuilding didn’t work. Teaching didn’t work. Mothering didn’t work. She has seen herself as a failure at everything she aspired to. Thus the drinking, self medication to feel better with her pathetic self. I won’t go into my feelings about Terri as this language is not allowed here. Kaine was probably working at home 3 to 5 days a week as problems with Terri escalated. I can’t go into everything I want to say or everything I feel. Kyron has my heart and I have felt his presence so much lately. I feel him reaching out. I will say many, many prayers for this sweet angel tonight. I’m just too sad to comment any futher. Thousands love you Kyron and we all want you home safe and sound. I just wholeheartedly hope that this will happen. The Good Lord needs to listen to the thousands who love this little guy and somehow perform a miracle. My heart is heavy and I will just leave this with my deep love for Kyron and serious prayers for Desiree and Kaine. I am behind Kaine 100% in all of his recent efforts at locating his beloved son. God Bless You Kyron. Peace Be With You.

  14. NelMel says:

    I think now it’s possible that Kaine and Desiree moving apart in the last month or so, concerning presenting a united front to the public, might very well be based on Desiree becoming fully aware of what was really happening in the Horman household. Perhaps she’s decided that she’s too angry at Kaine to be appearing with him in public. I can’t blame her and I would actually expect that kind of reaction. At some point, a court decision deemed that Kaine’s home was the best place for Kyron to be, rather than moving back to live with Desiree. In her shoes, I can imagine a terrible blend of anger and bitterness and guilt.

    Returning to their separate lives now might allow both of them to focus on additional strategies to find out what happened to Kryon. They can think separately. New ideas and fresh strategies usually occur with a shift in scenery. For a while, over the summer, I was sensing that Desiree had the same type of interaction with Kaine that was always present. If anyone else noticed — whenever they spoke together in public, Desiree would turn to Kaine as if to get a sense he would agree with or approve of what she was about to say.

    If you have never faced what Kaine faced at home, you can’t really understand what you might view as his passive acceptance of the problem. He might have seriously believed he could “fix” his home life. But I also bet he never wanted Desiree to know the details.

    Two parents now have to forgive each other and work with LE to find their little boy. That might be a long road for both of them. I see Kyron being found at some point, but I also see irreversible damage to any civil communication that KH and DY might have sustained all these years. I hope they overcome that, in the event that their little boy is still alive and comes home.

    I continue to not tell myself that Kyron is dead. But that’s the mother in me.

  15. enumclawrose says:

    To say KH is an enabler or to say he is in denial is only to say he is human. I think we have to acknowledge that none of these people are perfect, and to point out their potential perceived flaws is not to condemn them, it is just to point out the family dynamics.

    KH’s attorney’s would stop him from doing or saying anything they see that could hurt his case. A deposition is usually a list of questions that can be presented on paper, or more formally with the other lawyer asking the questions, which I presume was the case here. I would like to know when TH will be deposed.

    The sexting has more to do with the timing than the content, however repulsive the content might be, a month into a child gone missing and days into losing custody of another is why are stomachs are really turning.

    TH’s parents must be deeply conflicted, as are all of the people who love her. TH is most likely self-medicating to compensate for an emotional or mental disorder. BUT PEOPLE, there is an elephant in the room, ALL BETS ARE OFF, a child is missing and presumed dead. HELLO, is anybody listening??

  16. Nancy says:

    @puzzled: I find it interesting that Kaine said in the beginning that he wanted this to be all about finding Kyron … and this latest filing is not helping in that effort. It seemed directed at TH to humilate and degrade her … not really to find out about Kyron.

    ————————————————
    With all due respect, at issue in Kaine’s latest filing is TH’s request for visitations with Kiara – an entirely different matter than locating Kyron.

    Kaine and his divorce attorney would be remiss not to divulge this information as part of the visitation issue – not to humiliate or degrade TH – but to ensure Kiara’s safety and well being.

  17. Marleysmom says:

    Do we actually know where James is living now? With his dad or Terri? It has been suggested that he lived with her now but I don’t actually know. Earlier in the postings someone mentioned that his dad and stepfather (the one paying the child support) should use their influence to keep him away from her.

    It would seem negligent by human services if he was with her but really didn’t want to be. She certainly has used her wiles on him in the past. It would be hard to know where his head is on this. It certainly has been a rough road for him.

    Can he be called to testify in any of the trials coming up. Where would his loyalties be? What would his information bring to the table?

    Kiara is his sister. In time he would like to see her and Kaine.

    I have always wondered who watches Kiara when Kaine is at work? Is it a family member, a daycare situation, or a babysitter? I haven’t seen any mentioned.

    Aside from Kaine’s father, earlier on, nothing has been mentioned about his parents. Are they both living. Where do they live? What have they said? Have they or Desiree’s parents been mentioned in any of the news reports?

    I think Kaine said what he did this week to get it on the record so it can be used in a court later on. Otherwise It might not be gotten in. I am sure his lawyer was involved in putting it together. I felt it could have been written better but at least it is out in the open now.

    The “sex texting” really showed a side of Terri that shows what she is about and where her mind was at such a horrible time for everyone else. She was pathetically aggressive and there is no question she has been doing this for quite something. Have to wonder what her computer showed. I bet it is quite a read.

    To bring up that an acquaintance had an idea to raise money for her defence is so strange. Obviously she has something to defend and the friend knew it. Nothing about raising money for Kyron’s search, where is he, etc.

    I have never seen it discussed if she gave her lawyer any or all money up front. $350,000 won’t begin to cover her. What about the second one. If she goes to jail there will be no recovery for any extra charges.

    We certainly have a more complete picture of Terri than we did before. After reviewing her sex texting her reality is way out there. One very messed up person. The question begs is “how did this happen?” Spoiled by her parents, worked her wiles with men. That doen’t answer it. No incidents of really bad things happening to her. How did she turn into this person?

    She knew from the get go she was in trouble. She knew what had happened and it would come back on her. I found it amazing that LE never got anything from her about Kyron. I think something got blown there by how LE handled it.

    My thoughts and prayer are for Desiree, Tony, Kaine, Kiara and her two brothers. I hope time will help lesson the blow.

  18. Valkyrie says:

    1. With regards to the claim that we don’t know who is on the other end of MC’s text messages: Terri texted PHOTOS of herself. These transcripts are not some LE conspiracy to sully a poor housewife’s good name. Since my background is LE, I always feel very saddened to wonder what life experiences some people might have had to make them so paranoid of all LE. Please know that it is not the norm. Yes, there are officers who are terrible at their jobs (just as there are negligent doctors, criminal lawyers, illiterate teachers, Ponzi-scheme investors and so on). And a small percentage of LE officers turn out to be truly rotten people, at probably around the same percentage as the general population. That said, with the number of agencies involved, and with the scope and media attention of this case, I can guarantee that at least one person involved has an IQ over 70. It’s just not realistic that they are fabricating text messages to destroy the reputation of an unsuspecting housewife simply because they have nothing better to do (except for the small matter of a missing child of tender age).

    2. The only time this case has made me smile: Terri asks MC if he is coming over, and he responds “Not sure…right now I’m writing an extensive email to Kaine.” That’s classic.

    3. At 22:39:40 Terri reports she and Dede are eating nutterbutter bites before the texts spiral into threats of arm wrestling. So Dede her “casual friend” was there during this whole transaction? Didn’t Dede say she slept on the couch? And given the comment at 00:01:56, does that mean she slept in the wet spot? The banter is strange enough for a woman alone in her house, but with DeDe there?? I see a “bipolar with hypersexual mania” defense in the making.

    4. During undergrad, my chemistry and physics classes always had some students who “just didn’t get it.” That doesn’t mean Bernoulli’s principle is untrue or unfounded, it just means those students didn’t get it. They were missing some key component or experience that would help them understand. Some day everyone may know what LE knows, and then maybe we’ll get it. Maybe. If it suits our world view.

    My Pal Val-

    It is just sickening. The matter of whether or not she is involved in Kyron’s disappearance aside, given her disassociative activities while her 7 year old step-son was missing, and her apparent Fugly coping, I would not let her my child under any set of circumstances. Rackner will prevail, even though I think there were parts of her motion that could harm her own client.

    Less is more.
    B

  19. Montana Mom says:

    @Mother Hen: I am an Oregon native by two generations. Why is Oregon taking such a beating in this case? Every state experiences cases like this. Kyron could have lived in any large city in any state and the same thing could have happened. Never settle on living in a place you dislike–that is the beauty of being an adult verses a child–you can choose where you live and who you surround yourself with. Unlike Kyron, bless him bless him.

  20. enumclawrose says:

    Eloise, where are you? We miss you.

  21. Jeff D says:

    Rackner will prevail, even though I think there were parts of her motion that could harm her own client.

    Less is more.
    B
    ~~~~~~~~

    I agree. His own statement recounting her shortcomings opened the door to his culpability. I would look for her attorney to shed some light on that issue. I personally do not believe he should feel guilt. Inevitably, he does.

  22. Jeff D says:

    Jeesh…missed that whole point B….strike that please…:)

  23. enumclawrose says:

    Evie 10-27 4:43pm

    I think you picked up on the crux of the motive as outlined by KH, however, I am having trouble reconciling it in my mind. How does TH’s sexual actvities translate into a seven year old child disappearing?

    There has been speculation that Ky found out about her activities, or that she may have been having an affair with an opportunistic peodophile, but otherwise, I can’t see the connection.

    What we read in exhibit 1, has to be the tip of the iceberg, because vulgar as it was, it wasn’t material to cause murder or abduction. There has to be more than sexting to qualify a sexual motive. What is it?

  24. mosaic says:

    LinTN,

    I’m curious and I hope you don’t mind me asking…you commented that “Truthfully, Kaine is the one with the narcissistic personality.” You state that you do not live anywhere near the area otherwise I would have assumed that you live in Portland and know Kaine personally. But since you don’t live there, which of Kaine’s actions or behaviors lead you to believe that he is narcissistic?

    From what I’ve observed in his public appearances he appears to be very focused, he speaks plainly and logically and he’s unconcerned with his appearance. He seems to keep his emotions in check and at the same time he’s transparent about his motivation–finding his son.

    None of his actions indicate to me that he is someone who is self-absorbed or craving attention for himself.

  25. Midwest Mom says:

    Valkyrie says:
    October 27, 2010 at 9:54 pm

    I’m not sure how you understood who is on the other phone was a LE conspiracy. It was in regards to the man who was doing the texting, and what his motives were. I am sure that LE has the disposable phone that was used in the texting.

    It doesn’t surprise me he was writing KH an e-mail, MC is KH friend. IMO not my type a friend and someone I would not let around my child.

    What could of been the reason for LE to turn over these texting to KH? Was this needed to convince the courts that Kiara was in danger?

    _____________________________________

    http://blinkoncrime.com/2010/07/12/kyron-horman-missing-and-endangered-kaine-horman-accuses-terri-of-contempt-with-michael-cook/comment-page-9/#comments

    (snipped)

    lillor says:

    July 14, 2010 at 9:11 am

    The background story that has since been removed from Shannon Cook’s Toxic Relationship Coach website (you can verify by googling the first two sentences and you will see that it used to be here http://www.stoptoxicrelationships.com/background.html )

    He drank excessively and criticized me for being too uptight and judgmental when I expressed concerns about his alcohol and marijuana consumption. Yet he was passing out from drinking and missing flights home from work trips, staying out all night, and leaving his drug paraphernalia in potentially child accessible locations. I was told I was paranoid for asking about other women and that I clearly “had too much time on my hands.” He was frustrated with my depression. My husband regularly refused to respond to my desire for intimacy – which left me feeling hurt, rejected, and undesirable. He told me if I didn’t like the way he was and needed to have sex regularly, to go have an affair.
    I tried everything I could think of to salvage our relationship. I read self help books, save-your-marriage books, and even managed to convince him to attend couple’s counseling. Nothing helped. I considered leaving, but quickly dismissed the idea. I believed a marriage was supposed be for life, but practically speaking, I also had the problem of no job and a young child. I felt worthless and helpless and the prospects of going it on my own seemed overwhelming.
    As it turned out, my negative perceptions of the years of living this way were only the tip of the iceberg. One Thanksgiving, I discovered that my husband was having an affair with a coworker. From there, I slowly discovered the truth piece by piece. My husband was binge drinking often, using cocaine, having multiple sexual encounters with friends, colleagues, clients, and strangers, hiding large sums of cash from me, and compulsively lying about all of it on a daily basis.
    I was already feeling crazy, inferior, and undesirable, and was close to the breaking point before the whole picture began to emerge. When I finally discovered the truth, my world crashed in and I felt humiliated and devastated. I was a homemaker in an abusive marriage, mentally beaten down and weak. I was unsure how to go on. I felt I had no choice but to file for divorce.
    The abuse continued throughout the next 8 months until the divorce finalized. Now that everything was out in the open, the cruelty became more flagrant. Though I still lived there, my husband began bringing his current mistress home, even when my son was there asleep. I walked in on an empty cocaine vial in the kitchen and my husband in bed with the other woman. My husband threw an elaborate and lavish birthday party for his mistress, inviting many of his coworkers, who were our mutual friends, to attend. He had never thrown a party for me in all our years together.
    My spending was critiqued extensively and I was still sitting on the knowledge that my husband had tens of thousands of dollars he was trying to keep from me. All the while, he was continuing to drink, use drugs, and proposition other women openly. I desperately wanted to take my son and move out, but to that point, my son had not been exposed directly to my husband’s behavior and my attorney claimed there was no “imminent danger” so I needed to stay in our house or leave my son with his father. I had no intention of doing that. However, the torture was almost unbearable. I had no peace, no sanctuary in my own home. I had to take anti-anxiety and antidepressant medication just to make it through the day.
    All of this was a high price to pay for my ultimate freedom, both financially, legally, and emotionally. I looked and looked for some kind of overall support group to help me through it. I sought online message boards dealing with different aspects of my process and issues, but many of the boards weren’t very active, and information was coming in piecemeal. I spent thousands and thousands of dollars in clocked time asking my attorney questions that he ultimately couldn’t satisfactorily answer because they were outside his area of expertise. I consulted with my team of experts, but none could offer me a big picture view, or walk me through all the steps. I wasted money, time, and made mistakes that I did not need to make. Fumbling around alone, I sorted it all out as best I could and managed to address the various issues involved – but I knew that the trial and error approach was wasteful, cost me financially, and was a very high price to pay emotionally in time and confusion.

  26. Marleysmom says:

    @ Blink, I too agree that Rackner had left in parts of her motion that could harm Kaine. I shuddered as I read some of the information Kaine gave out. He left himself open to further discussion as to why he wasn’t taking care of things since he was aware of a portion of them. I know they wanted the information out but, it was almost most if they really didn’t reread it and reread it and take out or rewrite some of the information. Less is definitely more

  27. Malty says:

    Actually I think those 2 had a few drinks and had read all about
    MC story by his ex Shannen (?)
    and knew he was a player so both of them were in on the sexting
    and the nuttybutter
    the two of them not worried about Kyron at all , just having a fun time
    yuck

  28. GraceintheHills says:

    29.Midwest Mom says:
    October 27, 2010 at 12:04 pm
    “SIGH” regarding the sworn affidavit…
    It appears the KH has changed his story over time and I think it is important to point out what he has said and what he is now saying. We need to find Kyron.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    MidwestMom, you post this link and compare what KH said about TMH in that past with what he said in the recent sworn affidavit:
    http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/07/terri_hormans_emails_to_kyron.html
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    @MidwestMom and Blinkettes: I have no problem with the affidavit KH filed IN RESPONSE to TMH’s motion for visitation with Kiara. LE/judges told him there was probable cause to believe TMH not only tried to hire someone to kill him, but that she is also is involved in Kyron’s disappearance. So, this is NOT some vendetta against TMH that Kaine dreamed up himself. The information LE has shared with him is fueling SOME of his actions, IMHO, but not all of them. BTW, in the course of my career, I have seen so many filings/affidavits with more disgusting allegations in them than this one.

    I believe Kaine is DESPERATE to find Kyron. What would people have him do at this point? Go out and comb every inch of Oregon on his hands and knees looking for any piece of evidence that might be left of his beloved son? I believe, if he could, he would be out there day and night. His love for that boy is palpable.

    Is anyone of us a perfect parent? Of course not. There but for the grace of God, go many of us. We are so blessed that we are not caught up in a drama so horrific, so unfathomable, that it moves a seasoned police chief to tears. So, as a compassionate person, I am giving Kaine a LOT of latitude and keeping him in my prayers. What I don’t understand is why the COURT could not have sealed some parts of his affidavit, but that was the court’s decision, not Kaine’s. Maybe some of the legal eagles on this site can explain.

    Thank you SO much for that audio link. I agree that everyone should listen to it again as it has so much relevant information.

    Here are some of the remarks that stood out for me:

    1-KH remarked that TMH’s story that she related to LE of what she did and her whereabouts on June 4th was “all over the place”. In other words, LE couldn’t pin her down. He also said all the erroneous information about Ky’s first two years of life was completely fabricated by TMH. Why would she do that? I have my suspicions, and it goes to the heart of her character.

    2-TMH herself told Kaine and Desiree that LE told HER that her cell phone pinged in areas she denied being in that day.

    3-The emails that TMH sent Desiree that day were unusually perfunctory.

    4-Kaine seemed *particularly* bothered by the fact that TMH told him SPECIFICALLY she needed his truck that day to pick up Ky’s diorama, but she didn’t stay around at the school or go back at 10 AM to pick it up when she knew the projects were set to be released. Listening to him talk about this suggested to me that he believes she used that truck for something much more sinister.

    5-Kaine and Desiree know more about TMH’s timeline of that day, but are unable to share it with media because LE has asked them not to reveal it. At several points in the interview they made it clear that he and DY are privy to much more than the general public when it comes to the lies TMH has told LE.

    6-Kaine and Desiree strongly imply that they and LE NOW know that TMH is a pathological liar. Listening to them talk about this made me think she lives in a world of her own design. Unfortunately, it seems to have very little to do with reality. MOO.

    7-Kaine and Desiree feel strongly that TMH KNOWS where Kyron is. They feel she may have had friends that inadvertently may have helped her commit this crime. Desiree has a hinky feeling (“mother’s intuition”) about DDS.

    8-Kaine says he started to “miss” things about TMH’s behavior around 2005.

    9-Kaine discovered TMH was consuming alcohol behind his back around the time she got her DUI.

    10-It appears TMH never had an official diagnosis of Postpartum Depression, but was taking an unknown medicine at some point.

    11-As I pointed out before, Desiree reminded us that women suffering from PPD do not engage in the type of behavior TMH allegedly engaged in. **At this point, Desiree seems to slip and reveal that they are aware that TMH was SCHEMING TO HARM PEOPLE at or around that time.** I think this is a very important revelation.

    In summary, there were many remarks made in this interview that suggested to me that Kaine and Desiree are indeed privy to considerable circumstantial, and perhaps even direct evidence. There is a lot cookin’ behind the scenes, folks. MOO.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Lord, please watch over Kyron.

  29. Midwest Mom says:

    IDK, Am I the only one that fears, that when LE reveals what happened to Kyron, that they are going to say

    We told them she wasn’t a suspect
    We told them she was cooperating
    We told them that the Lie detector test was investigative
    We told them that the MFH wasn’t proven
    We told them that we knew her time line
    We told them that she denied her involvement
    We told them there wasn’t a safety risk to Kiara other than 6/26

    and yet…they still kept insisting TH_ _ _

    ___________________________________________

    It is sad, my heart hurts, kyron is out there somewhere. I just want to sit them down and say to them “THINK” give us another direction to go on. Is there anyone else that looked at kyron a certain way, is there someone you pizzed off, anyone that was jealous of either one of you, or wanted to seek revenge on you or TH, or TY? someone who thought something wasn’t “fair”, someone from your past? someone in another state? a distant relative? a stranger you befriended online that may have forgotten about? a person who always wanted a child? someone that didn’t think you were a good parent,someone who may have been bullying kyron, who wouldn’t have wanted for Kyron to go fishing with TY? there was a plan in place and that didn’t happen, why? …IDK just “think’ “THINK” of every possibility ANYTHING,SOMETHING?

    because what if…what if… your interpretations of your feelings have been wrong?

    Prayers for Kyron and family

  30. MockingbirdSings says:

    NelMel says:
    October 27, 2010 at 7:47 pm
    If anyone else noticed — whenever they spoke together in public, Desiree would turn to Kaine as if to get a sense he would agree with or approve of what she was about to say.
    ——————–
    I noticed, but I believe it was because (1) they were trying to respect each other and speak as 2 parents wanting the same thing, (2) they were trying to help each other answer carefully to avoid saying something that might hurt the investigation, and (3) to give Desiree a chance to regain her composure which it appears she needed several times off camera. Kaine looks at her while she’s speaking also. I don’t think Desiree would think she needed his personal approval to do or say anything.

  31. MockingbirdSings says:

    Someone can correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe the media can get copies of any motions in this case unless a judge determines they should be sealed. It would be hard to make a case for that because the existence of most of the information was already known. I do not believe Kaine personally released them to anyone. I agree that the latest document does not seem to be focused on finding Kyron, but at some point decisions have to be made knowing he may not be found.

    I can tell you for a fact, however, that in Oregon, assuming Kaine would keep custody of Kiara and no visitation would be allowed would be a big mistake. Kaine had to add more information. Even the sexting (which isn’t illegal to my knowledge) may not be enough since it wasn’t done in front of Kiara, and Terri could deny drinking or leaving Kiara unsupervised while she was drunk. Just because we think it’s inappropriate and shows bad judgment (at the very least), doesn’t make it enough to prove someone should lose parental rights.

    Oregon will allow supervised visits with a parent who is incarcerated, or who is an alcoholic or drug addict as long as they do not appear under the influence of something at the time of the visit and the child was not a victim of that parent. I don’t see a reason for a DHS case to be opened at this point because Kiara has one responsible parent taking care of her now. It’s up to the judge to decide what happens next – unless Terri decides to withdraw her motion to modify the RO.

    I want to make one thing perfectly clear because I’m not sure I have done this often enough in what I’ve said – none of us, including myself of course, can accurately evaluate, diagnose, or label in any way the mental health of either Terri or Kaine. Even the most experienced, best educated people posting on this site do not have enough personal knowledge of either of them to do anything more than offer an opinion of what certain behaviors may point to. It’s fairly easy to separate our theories and scenarios of timelines and activities from the actual facts that have been verified, but maybe not so easy to maintain that separation when it comes to judging character and mental health. I am not defending anyone’s actions, just saying my interpretation of those actions is always MOO.

  32. beejay says:

    Isn’t this the first time that Terri’s attys have seen the MCook sexts? I thought that from KH’s Affidavit, stating that.

    If so, Rackner has lost one point on strategy–and had to sacrifice it so that KH could push the no-visitation issue. TH’s attys have accomplished what I believe they were going for here*: discovery as early as possible. Otherwise, they would not have had access to what LE has about MCook sexting.

    (*Oh, and incidentally, Bunch’s motion to expedite the visitation issue was also because TH would like to see their daughter.) MOO

    *******************************

    Marleysmom: Last I read, Bunch said that James is staying with TH and her parents.

    As to Kitty, I know there’s a daycare center at the Intel campus where KH works. Haven’t heard where she is actually being cared for, however. Intel would, to me, be the safest and most convenient place. Good security for a daycare center. Fewer strangers coming and going. And, KH very early on established a “no-talking” standard for Intel personnel.

    *************************

    Blink said: Less is more.
    B
    _________________

    You said it. WAY overkill for the issue at hand. IMHO, designed in part for public consumption.

  33. Lazydog1 says:

    This whole sexting thing makes me sick to my stomach. This is not a teenager having a fling. This is a woman in her 40′s with three children and a husband at that time. One of those precious children is missing and had who knows what done to him.

    My Pal Val-

    It is just sickening. The matter of whether or not she is involved in Kyron’s disappearance aside, given her disassociative activities while her 7 year old step-son was missing, and her apparent Fugly coping, I would not let her my child under any set of circumstances. Rackner will prevail, even though I think there were parts of her motion that could harm her own client.

    Less is more.
    B

    Blink regarding Rackner putting info in there that could harm her client. Is it possible she sees it as better than Houze doing it. Honesty is better coming from her client than Houze smearing him all over the map. JMO

    I find it odd that Houze hasn’t thrown any info out there that somehow smears Kaine. Is it because there really isn’t anything he can use that would be honest?

  34. Idahogal says:

    8.Rich M says:
    October 27, 2010 at 6:07 pm

    @Rich M- Here are links to the court docs from KOIN.com. Read them while you can, they may disappear like so many others:

    http://www.koinlocal6.com/media/lib/107/a/4/6/a466434a-e631-4fef-96c5-8162118cb371/petition.pdf

    http://www.koinlocal6.com/media/lib/107/f/1/2/f12d5e9c-5f4f-4cb5-8d93-0979d33f4120/redacted_text_messages.pdf

  35. kitjcat117 says:

    Less is more.
    B

    I agree Blink. I wouldn’t want Rackner to show all her cards at once, it’s still early in the game. I do believe she has an ace in the hole and this was just a preview.

  36. MissMonkey says:

    @Idahogal: Although I do not disagree that the content of the sexting will be embarrassing for James and at some point, Kiara, these would have come out eventually. I have no doubt that LE would have used this, and still might, at the criminal trial. Perhaps TMH should have thought about it since she seemed, from those texts, to be aware that her phone was ‘flashed’.

    @Valkyrie: MC’s quip about the email to KH also gave me a much needed giggle. I still can’t tell if that was a joke or if he was for real. Either way.. classic. And glad to see that I wasn’t the only one who thought about the wet spot/DS issue.

    And now I am back to feeling ill.

  37. mamasocks says:

    Still trying to get a clear picture here. I still stand by my impression of Terri being one scared cookie. Yes the sexting is disturbing but I also caught “only been with 4 men” and at the end “I didn’t do” which was cut off. Just saying that I think Terri felt that she had nothing else going for her except her sex. I find her pathetic rather than evil and slutty but this is my opinion based on very true facts. We are not being told of Terri’s full reaction to this whole mess, only what the press and LE wants us to know. I feel Terri would have grabbed on to a lampost at that point for support in any way she could. And please – I am not defending her – but this is what I see at this point.

  38. Mother Hen says:

    Montana Mom,

    I don’t want to be rude and ignore you but I don’t want to be off-topic. There was plenty discussed on the matter. You can go back and read a variety of posts by others as well to try and undertand better if you would like.

    Have a nice day.

  39. beejay says:

    @ Midwest Mom says:
    October 28, 2010 at 12:49 am
    ________________

    I’m with you. I hope LE is all over this, and already investigating the questions you listed. KH is just in his own world; he is not the confidant of LE; he can only work with what he has and is in no mental condition to do any problem-solving.

    Again, I just want to scream, “Hire a really good PI if you want to find out what happened to your son earlier than shortly before you read it in the papers.”

    **************************

    @ LinTN says:
    October 27, 2010 at 1:41 pm

    Ok, I have never posted before…
    ___________________

    Well, you did a fine job. I’d like to hear more from you. We need all the help we can get here.

  40. cd says:

    Valkyrie says:
    October 27, 2010 at 9:54 pm

    1. With regards to the claim that we don’t know who is on the other end of MC’s text messages: Terri texted PHOTOS of herself. These transcripts are not some LE conspiracy to sully a poor housewife’s good name.

    2. The only time this case has made me smile: Terri asks MC if he is coming over, and he responds “Not sure…right now I’m writing an extensive email to Kaine.” That’s classic.
    _____________________________________________________________________________________________________

    I don’t think anyone here believes that LE constructed the text messages to make TH look guilty. I think the mistrust here is directed at MC. MC was a friend of KH at the time the texting occurred, and the texting was not the only revelation in this case that came from MC’s cell phone. It just seems kind of strange since MC says that there was never a physical relationship between him and TH. Also i thought that the 2 pictures associated with the texting did not include TH’s face but were of other body parts. Since I have never seen the pictures I could wrong.

    Does anyone have info on what was in the photo’s other then various body parts.

    I would like to add that I have great respect for LE and that all of my comments here are merely speculation and not intended to cast any kind of derisive shadow on law enforcement.

  41. puzzled says:

    With the release of the sext/texts, bloggers are already chasing down who has been associated with who. So did LE… thus resulting in the “things we wish we didn’t know”.

    We now have confirmation of what TH has been doing .. the next wave is the exposure of her “associates”… again, things LE has learned.

    IMO, these texts were just the tip of the iceberg… and what is still yet to be made pubic, will leave us going lalalalalalala!!

    Slowly the heat is being turned up on the water .. and it will reach a boiling point that will spill over.

  42. Idahogal says:

    FWIW, I really try to live my life by the motto “Don’t judge a person until you have walked a mile in their shoes”. Most of the time I am able to follow my own rule, but every now and then someone comes along that makes it impossible for me to do that. A few examples are Scott Peterson, Susan Smith, Diane Downs… well the list could just go on and on. Terri Horman is on that list for me. I cannot look the other way with her, I find her behavior when her stepson is missing inexcusable and disgusting, to say the least. I am sick of trying to be nice, giving her the benefit of the doubt or evidence, and tip toeing around the glaring, obvious disregard for others that she consistenly shows. Whether she is involved in what happened to Ky or not, I consider her a selfish, deceitful bitch and I will not apologize for that. She brought all of this on herself, her parents, the children, everyone. She has let loose a path of destruction, pain, anguish and embarrassment on every sinlge person in her life, and she makes me sick.
    Enough said, I’m moving on and will keep working on finding Kyron and the person(s) responsible for whatever happened to him. I have his picture right here on my desk so that I don’t forget whom I am fighting for: an innocent, beautiful child with a smile that lights up the world. Blessed are the children, for they shall see God. Amen.

  43. Observant says:

    I shudder at the thought that these are only a sample of the texts, it has been reported that there are hundreds…

    http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/search-kyron-terri-horman-accused-abducting-daughter-affair/story?id=11149983

  44. Mother Hen says:

    CD,

    I did not really see where the “world view” comment from Valkyrie fit into this board. More to the point, I thinkk it is more of the poster’s world view to believe LE should be trusted at all times and not questioned.

    Respect and trust are EARNED. They should never be a given. And those in power should be held to a higher standard due to the power that they yield. So I do NOT believe that corrupt LE is equal to the general population of corruption — it is worse than that.

    But I agree that I don’t think anyone is pinning LE for constructing the messages.

  45. Dee says:

    My husband was not as grossed out by the sexts as I was. He saw a pathetic woman alone in the world using anything she could to get support from anyone. When I re-read them, they did seem rather forced…I mean, she got “horney” (her spelling) awfully fast without any real prompting from him. I am still grossed out but I also see what my husband saw.

    Like other posters here, I too have wondered what forces could have created this woman. I know that she was adopted at 8 months and I wonder who she was with during those first 8 months. If she was not with her mother but in some type of institution, she would have missed the critical time for bonding. Eight months of age is too late. People who miss the bonding stage are forever lonely. They have a big hole in their hearts that they don’t know how to fill. They also may find it easier to commit a crime because they, never having been deeply connected to a human being, would find it easier to dispense with empathy and disconnect from the crime being committed. If her adopted parents spoiled her, (which is what I observe to be the case), then a sense of entitlement would have developed along with the foregoing characteristics. The end result could be true sociopathic behavior.

    In our culture today there a millions of orphans, most of whom have living parents either unwilling or unable to care for them and with whom they have never bonded. I shudder to think of all the little Terri Hormans growing up among us.

  46. cd says:

    I don’t think that this is important at all, but it keeps coming up and it bothers me, It is mentioned in the following interview with DY and KH that TH lied about her friendship with DY.

    http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/07/terri_hormans_emails_to_kyron.html

    statement at 00.13.05

    following is what I read about TH’s supposed friendship with DY
    snip..

    “Someone had to watch the baby,” said Amanda Howards, the former wife of Kaine’s brother Kristian. “Terri was her friend. She moved in just to help with the baby.”

    http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/06/kyron_hormans_blended_family_f.html

    The above article says that Kaines’s ex sister in law made the statement that Desiree and Terri were friends. and TH moved in to help with the baby. Did TH later confirm this statement or something? or maybe she was the one that told Kaine’s sister in law this?

  47. Marleysmom says:

    I would like to get an opinion as to whether James will be testifying at any upcoming court proceedings. What would his testimony be?

    Also when will he turn 18 and Terri won’t be receiving child support for him will she still want/need him to live with her. He must have very mixed feelings of being with her. He probably is aware of so much that she did and was her protector at times as well as Kyron’s and Kiara’s.

    This will undoubtedly effect him for life and I wonder how he will manage. I think posters here are giving him more credit than he earned with Terri as his teacher. He also may be messed up in his future. Prays for this young man. I hope his
    buddy’s and teacher’s at school have empathy for him and help him through and the school is working with him.

    Terri knew James was coming that weekend and yet she is most likely responsible for his brother’s disappearance. Hard to believe. Actually doesn’t make sense that it would have happened that weekend.

    @beejay – thanks for clearing up where James was living. So sad though.

  48. Malty says:

    I should read first as you guys catch everything
    but it bothers me that Kiara was in the house
    while Terri and DeDe were having fun and
    this sexting was going on
    and maybe that is the reason it is out there

  49. Malty says:

    Or am I wrong ? Was Kiara with Kaine. I get all confused LOL

  50. twinkletoes says:

    Mamasocks, I caught that “only been with 4 (or was it 5) men” also and I had to chuckle. My husband and I have a little joke where he asks me, “have you ever done this before?” and I say, “never!”
    IMO, she is saying she’s only been with a few guys because she thinks that makes he more appetizing. She’s clearly sexually agressive and that attracts a heck of a lot more than 4 or 5 guys by the time you hit the 40′s. Not that it makes her a child killer, right. But I think most of what she does is fabricated and designed to give her some sort of little high. Gross that MC was into it.

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