Beauty and The Beast: The Predictable Murder of Yeardley Love By George Huguely
Disclaimer– exclusive original content copyright and property of Internet Network News, LLC and Blinkoncrime.com. Reproduction of this article , ANY OF IT’S Conclusions, comments or CONTENT, in whole or in part, without proper attribution and source link is strictly prohibited without prior written permission.
Charlottesville, VA- At approximately 9 PM the evening of May 2nd, George Huguely, V left a golf outing he drank at all day, visibly intoxicated according to fellow attendees. It was the beginning of the end of a rancorous binge drinking track record for the prodigal son of George and Marta (Sanson Murphy) Huguely.
It was the gruesome end for star athlete Yeardley Reynolds Love.
Yeardley said ITS OVER to the heir of Huguely’s family’s century old lumber business and spent the last weeks of her life in fear George would make good on his threats.
Sources inside the circle of Love and her family have stated that the most recent threats and public observation of the couple occurred at Huguely’s former frat, Delta Kappa Epsilon.
Following this incident, Yeardley left campus and stayed at her Cockeysville home where her Mother, Sharon Donnelly Love, begged her to file a police report.
Yeardley refused as she did not want it to interrupt the last weeks of both teams winning seasons. She believed because the last scene was so public Huguely would have no choice but to back off for fear of compromising his status on the UVA mens team.
For anyone unsure about the locker room brethren, as reported by NY Daily News:
A former Virginia student who was friends with both Love and Huguely described a disturbing incident in which Huguely recently reportedly attacked Love, then had no recollection of it the next day, which precipitated their final breakup. “He was really messed up and punched a window of a car on the way over to her apartment that night,” the friend said, speaking on the condition of anonymity out of consideration for Love’s family. The friend said Huguely had been seen breaking bottles at another party before Love’s death and had told people he was going to her apartment to get Love back.
D K E
While Huguely is not listed as an active brother on DKE roster, this Falls newsletter touts an impressive Rush week which rounds out the Dekes with 14 Varsity Athletes; 12 of them from the men’s Lacrosse team. The DKE roster has not been updated to reflect active brothers since 2008 and an email request to alumni affairs director Ian Graham has not been returned. The DKE facebook account has been deleted.
By all accounts, in retrospect, Yeardley’s murder was a predictable incident. Preventable.
Not inasmuch as it could have been foreseen per se, but Generation George was a time bomb.
Incidents abound from his days in Palm Beach where he jumped ship after an argument with Generation G4 whereby he swam to shore as well as his arrest for drunken swearing and THREATENING TO KILL A COP WITH A SIDE OF RACIAL SLUR in November 2008.
There are 8 UVA Men’s Lacrosse members that have had alcohol related arrests in the last two years.
Nationally ranked 2008 Team Captain Will Barrow stunned the entire lacrosse community when he committed suicide two weeks after Huguely’s Rockbridge County arrest.
Ryan Nizolek, #24, was arrested in High School for smuggling steroids into the US from Mexico on a family vacation and brought them to school in a Rolaids bottle.
As the news broke of Yeardley’s murder I have been inundated with emails and texts from several UVA students and their family members that have been admonished not to speak publicly, not to accept new facebook friends and not to answer any questions from the media on or off campus.
The paradox of telling the grieving and concerned matriculation to effectively zip it, after doing just that may have cost Yeardley Love her life, is absurd.
A witness who observed the last physical confrontation between Love and Huguely email excerpt to blinkoncrime.com provided on the condition of anonymity:
…”You have to understand.. He is a big dude with a bigger personality. If anyone has ever told him no, I am not aware of it. It was obvious she did not want him near her. She told him that, and it took 3 of us to hold him back. She was a little thing and she put on a good face, but I walked away feeling like that was not over. I said to lax(xx) that asshole is going to get himself killed or kill somebody. He was nicer on the turf for f*cks sake, I didn’t get it…..”
We are all obsessed about our last year in the game. Everyone parties like rock stars because half of us have more money than rock stars. Well, our parents do.
That is bullshit about him not being a Deke, btw. He beat up a fellow brother in his sleep drunk off his ass one night because he was sleeping on the couch he wanted to sit on, or go to bed on or whatever- He was booted and his friends wanted to stay. That pissed him off royally. His Dad partied with us once in a while. I remember wishing he was my Dad, and then I saw those two go at it. I would still have been cool with a Dad that is that loaded, but not if it meant Huge was my bro.
It wasn’t so much that he was raging all the time. It was weird. It was more like he was 2 diff people. You know what I mean? Like a mood swing on crack. DON’T publish I said he was on crack. Roids for sure and there was mention of an 8 the day of the murder. It was almost like he felt like he was insulted when he was around better players than him. He loved the sport but he had no respect for anyone if they were better in the X.
Do I think anyone intervening could have stopped a murder? I am not sure if that is a fair question or a set up.
My Mom asked me the same thing. I told her I did not get it. There is tons of Hoo Pumpers everywhere, especially this season. I never saw him without some chick, so I don’t get that part. He was a big clamper I heard though, if he didn’t have something cookin. It was not like he could not **** anyone he wanted. He was always like .. Give and Go Bro, everytime I saw him and I had a date. Tell me if you don’t know the lingo but I think you might. I heard ya got skills.
Lol, I am aware that only happens in college before you say something lecture-like.
I really wish I knew that nobody knew what was going on with him. We woulda pulled that scared straight shit on him. Like his version, shop at target instead of Abercrombie for the rest of his life no beach houses. That mighta been harsh of me to say before now. We just hate what he did to his girl, and our last year. I worked my ass off, we all did, and it should have been our thing to remember. Instead, it is fu***** lockdown.
I have reviewed UVA Athletic Director Craig Littlepage quotes on the matter.
Frankly, as an editorial, that verbiage would not have flown from any coach I have ever had, or respected, regardless of the sport.
“They never told me, nothing was reported to me” is the equivalent of ignorance of the law, which is no defense.
How do 8 arrests and a suicide, among other “not so documentable” infractions NOT constitute a red flag, or an intervention?
Safety does not come with a price tag. It comes from accountability and awareness. Huguely posted bond following his arrest on November 15, 2008.
Somebody had to know he was incarcerated. He had a public defender in that case so the question is– Who posted it and how was the fact he was off campus for a few days prior to the Thanksgiving break missed by his coaches?
At the time of this writing, the Virginia Commonwealth has issued an order sealing the search warrants in this case retroactively.
While the justification of that request by Charlottesville Police has not been released, it is an unusual move in a case that has not even seen its first bond hearing or an indictment.
Could it mean that Huguely is connected to the murder of Morgan Harrington?
Virginia State Police, who maintains jurisdiction in the Harrington case is emphatic it is not.
..”It was a Lacrosse player who discovered the purse. However, there is no evidence to indicate any connection between Morgan or the Love homicide. .. There is no connection between these two homicides, so I am not going to even entertain the additional questions. We are not identifying the individual who found the purse…” Corrine Geller, PR Manager VSP to blinkoncrime.com
Morgan’s purse was located by an unidentified male lacrosse player on the way to boarding the bus to an exhibition match in Annapolis, MD.
We have a player accused of first degree murder that by his own statements has had violent encounters with others he has not remembered.
We have players with land connections to the area of North Garden as well an individual who has personally preformed site survey work on Blandemar and Anchorage Farm.
Have all the Lacrosse players been questioned about the circumstances of finding the posession of a missing and murdered woman who was last seen on the UVA campus?
The cases may be may be unrelated.
The Harrington’s buried their daughter Morgan.
The Love family is burying their daughter Yeardley.
Isn’t it time for a little disclosure as to whether or not these lingering questions have been asked and answered?
Yeardley Love, will receive her Bachelor’s Degree in Political Science with a minor in Spanish posthumously with her class from the University of Virginia.
Love’s family and friends begin receiving those wishing to pay their respects today where she will also be laid to rest tomorrow, in Maryland.
Related Posts
Related Posts:
655 Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI
lets just say without getting into specifics… i went to a small d-3 college with a very succesful lacrosse program and their behavior is not much different than those of the d-1 virginia boys
alcohol, partying, drugs, ‘roids, testosterone and the feeling of entitlement because of mom and dad’s money is not a good combination
Wow, Blink. Great piece. So much of what happened to Yeardley sounds like what Gavin de Becker was talking about on Oprah. GHV displayed so many of the warning signs, it’s a shame that no one took them seriously enough to intervene.
Two quick questions, Blink:
1. Is Yeardley’s father deceased?
2. Regarding the following sentence from your piece: “We have players with land connections to the area of North Garden as well an individual who has personally preformed site survey work on Blandemar and Anchorage Farm.”
1. Not that I am aware of
2. Correct
B
You called those with land connections “players,” but refered to the person who performed site surveying as “an individual.” To me that says this individual is *not* an LAX player. Is that correct?
Excellent work Blink thank you for putting yourself on the line and asking the difficult questions.
I agree these questions HAVE to be raised and unless GH has a rock solid alibi there are too many coincidences for it to be pushed under the carpet like everything else surrounding Yeardleys murder.
She did not listen to her “gift of fear” and tried to please everyone around her, and ended up being brutally killed. That aspect alone is very like what happened to our dear “shiny” Morgan.
Too sad for words.
Prayers to Loves family and friends, prayers to the Harringtons.
One very sad Hummingbird.
Love your post Acho! Any hints to answer #3?
You know what got to me was the fact that the incident prior where 3 team members and frat brothers had to pull him off poor Yeardley…she left school, went home for a few days, told her mother what happened and her mother wanted her to talk to LE. She refused due to not wanting to disrupt the teams.
That really bothers me..this attitude of their is no I in teams has to cease. Each member’s well being is more important then not having playoffs ruined. Her mother did everything right by encouraging her to make that call.
I think had she called police..there would not have been a different outcome. Even had a restraining order against him been issued (which it seems by his friends pulling him off of her they already delivered in a sense by his peers) he still would have done this to her. He was someone who didn’t take no for an answer..obviously even with his father. He would rather brave sharks in the ocean off Palm Beach then not have his way. A petulant toddler in the body of a huge man.
Restraining orders are broken so often that it relies solely on the individual to not go near the other person. Does anyone really believe restraining orders help in almost any situation? There has to more then just that response. Yet if he had been kicked off the lacrosse team, out of school..if revenge he wanted revenge he would get. This isn’t about love..this is about anger at not having what he wanted when he wanted it..person, place or thing.
So what is the answer we are searching for to keep people safe in our society? It truly goes beyond good parenting and social expectations.
The heart of the matter is this is someone who became a bully and had temper tantrums when he was drunk or abused other substances. Then why the abuse of the substances..because he had an underlying medical or mental condition that required that action. Until as a society we realize that so many people are wasting away on drugs and alcohol we will continue to have this problem. People self medicate for a reason.
Brilliant, True, and Haunting.
Hugs my friend
B
B, good job. I didn’t know there was another thread. Ha ha.. breaking news.. hours late… I know to check for new posts from now on. Good Job!!!
Thank You friend!
B
Yo WiseassMYtime-
Can you read? That article was posted at 4:48PM. Have you seen the account anywhere about the attack anywhere before this morning on blinkoncrime.com? NNNOOOOO.
Ere go you are actually confirming what is in my piece. Except that article could not get anyone to talk to them, and the dude that did was NOT THERE, and heard it third hand.
That said, I would seek to understand how Stargia disciplined Huguely and it did not get noted in his file or mentioned to the athletic director. Guess there were a few signs, like I said.
B
- – - -
Your email source is proven off base and obviously not a member of the team so you resort to calling me names? Pathetic – but it’s your site.
Yes, your a troll. I know exactly who you are “this time”.
Get a hobby already, this is not your thing
B
It has been reported that Harrington’s body was tortured or badly beaten. A LAX member found Harrington’s purse? The crime modus seems similar to Love’s. Loves was beaten to death too. Too coincident, isn’t. I think LE is not talking too much because they are gathering all the evidence to acuse the socialite and not too botch the case like OJs.
Everyone needs to start thinking and living in reality. QUIT telling girls there is help if they will only speak out. That is a lie. THAT is what has to change. I plan to take President Casteen’s advice so I hope his words spoken at Yeardley’s candlelight were sincere.
The choice of the song, “I’ll Stand by You,” to open the vigil almost immediately had tears streaming down my face. That was the very point.. WE did NOT protect her! I think it is fitting that the song is by The Pretenders because that’s the truth. We as a community pretended to protect her.
The ugly little lie is unless there is a change there is little chance for the victim. There is no avenue for real help. That is what has to change. Do NOT tell your friends and daughters to go to authorities for help until real change is in place. That is our mission now. The scholarships being set up are nice but won’t change what has to be changed. I think President Casteen was choked up because he has the bug that’s been going around. I truly wish he was choked up because he KNOWS he should have put in place an avenue of real protection for Yeardley.
The ceremony opened with an a cappella performance by the Virginia Belles. As they sang The Pretenders’ “I’ll Stand by You,” a song about protection and solidarity, candlelight slowly spread from student to student across the lawn and lower bowl of the amphitheater.
Bravo. Goosebumps.
B
Hello all I just wanted to add Yeardleys Father died from cancer in I believe 2005. What a heartbreaking Mothers day for so many mothers this year. I lost mine years ago, so to all I say hold your Mother just a little longer this year.
I think it is 2003, I will confirm.
B
Blink – I believe I have read a couple different places that Yeardley’s Dad had passed away (from cancer) in 2002.
Your right. I totally read the question wrong. I thought it was referring to GH dad. My bad.
B
Someone on JVM saying LE investigating allegations that GH attacked another student within last 2 months after his breakup with Love.
Friends say he went into students apt. when he was asleep and attacked him, because he suspected this guy and YL had a relationship.
Thanks seeme.
I think there are a few different accounts of incidents. Thanks for posting, I wonder if we will ever really know.
B
Wow. George certainly has dug himself quite a hole……. This is a brief and condensed list (not in chronological order) of the signs he was giving that he needed help, and that Yeardley (or any other woman in his life) was in danger.
1. Alcohol fueled argument with father on boat in Florida.
2. Resisting arrest and getting tasered in Lexington.
3. Getting kicked out of a fraternity for beating up a frat bro.
4. Beating up a team mate for walking Yeardley home.
5. Attacking Yeardley in public and having to be physically separated from her by friends.
6. Punching his hand through a window on his way to win Yeardley back.
7. Killing a woman with his bare hands
Have I missed anything?
I agree Blink…I think GH probably has a long history of violent behavior.
His victims will be lining up……it’s so sad, had any one of them come forward and/or pressed charges, we would not be discussing a murder of a beautiful young woman. Prayers for family and friends of Yeardly Love.
Nope Curious,I believe you are correct.Yeardly was let down in many ways and then murdered by a wolf in a self inflated entitled wolf’s clothing .He could not have been more transparent to those around him if he’d been living in high definition on the campus lawn.
curiousgeorge – I think you pretty well summed up the walking hurricane that was GH with Yeardley directly in his path. Sad. Unfortunate. Preventable. FTLOG when will we get tough and not tolerate this ridiculous silence and protection?
There is NO WAY in he** that at the very least, UVA athletics director did not know of GH’s problems. I can just imagine how fast those shredders have already been workiing to cover their a** on this one. But we can’t just blame UVA. It would appear that EVERYBODY ignored the signs of how dangerous a person GH was. My questions:
1. Did GH’s parents send him off to Landon because they could, or did they have problems at home with him so they sent him off to be someone elses problem on their money?
2. Did GH’s parents not see, after the fiasco in Fl, that their son needed help? They had enough money to buy everything else they wanted (2+ million dollar vacation home, yacht, etc), so why couldn’t they use their money more wisely and get him help?
3. How did GH rack up all these former charges and his parents not be aware of any problem with him? Did they give him an unlimited credit card/unlimited access to money? Who did he call when he got arrested when he was underage?
It’s hard for any parent to witness their own child in a downward spiral, and it’s even harder to admit there’s a problem & seek help for your child, but that’s your job as a parent. You take the good with the bad. It is YOUR job parents, to protect your child from themselves when they are to young to do it for themselves. You do not sweep their crap under the rug and put if off for someone else to clean up. Once your child is an adult, out on their own, there’s not much of anything you can do in the way of help, until it is to late. Had we not been privey to so much info about GH since this horrible crime, I might could give the parents a break. But we know what we do, and this kids parents failed him, and now he has failed society. Had one person along the way, in his younger years, stepped up to the plate and made this kid accountable for his actions, I don’t think we’d be here today. Just a sad sad situation all the way around. (And don’t get me wrong. I don’t feel sorry for him. He is an adult, and should be punished as an adult. Someone, anyone should have stepped in way back, and they didn’t, and this is the end result
We have to do better than this. As parents, friends, sisters, brothers, aunts,uncles/etc. Our society is running amock and everybody is looking the other way. So what does that say about US, the one’s who coulda/shoulda/woulda…
All the warning signs were not only there, they were as hard to miss as billboard size flashing neon signs. His parents, coaches, fellow players, everyone around him chose to ignore the signs. I do not find it that much of a stretch that Morgan met up with him by the unluckiest of chances that night, possibly partied for a little while, he tried to make advances on her, which she would have none of, he got angry when she turned him down, told him no, and the charming athelete turned into violent murderer. Point is, he could have been stopped a million times over and was not, and because of all the missed opportunities, one bright and shining life for sure, possibly two, have been lost. This is truly a sad, sad tragedy.
Blink, does this mean you know what specific players played in games that day? If so, what piece says who was in and who was out? I can’t find it your article, or the linked article about the matches.
I guess all I would like to know, did GH maake the trip, and if so, did he play, and if he didn’t, was that normal?
RE: I know who played and who was out, it is in the piece.
B
He was there. I have not commented on who played/didn’t, but I am aware of that information.
B
What needs to happen now is that anybody (woman or man) who has been attacked by GH, witnessed attacks, or know of his involvement in other attacks (or worse) need to come forward. He is going to have a team of some of the best defense lawyers in the nation, you can count on that, who will try to get him off as lightly as absolutely possible. The more people who testify about his long history of violence, the stronger the case, the stronger the sentence. This guy needs put away and he needs to stay put away. Duty calls, justice calls.
This may be a stupid thought, but I am still confused as to how the police got involved in the FL incident. Who notified them there was an issue? I would think swimming ashore would not necessarily alert police, so were there witnesses to an actual assault? I wouldn’t think any of the H’s would have invited outside help.??
Bink,
regaring your response to this poster:
“Boz says:
May 7, 2010 at 1:46 pm
Blink, if this Huguely kid was a POI in Morgan’s murder would the cops ever admit it now?
Boz for me, he could not have been, but to answer your question, no.
B”
can you please tell us why you do not believe GH could have been a POI in Morgans case? why do you rule him out? do you think Morgan’s killer is someone who has a strong affiliation to the lacrosse team?
looking forward to your insight as always
xo
I have not ruled him out.
I think until I understand exactly the extent of the investigation into the circumstances of finding her purse, and possibly the shirt, .3 mi away, I cannot rule out an affiliation with a lax player.
This is a bit what frustrates me in this case.
While I fully support VSP, I do not agree with the strategy they have employed in some issues in this case.
To their defense, I don’t know if they were handed a bag with a hole in it.
I am choosing my words.
B
xcoastal says:
May 7, 2010 at 7:26 pm The choice of the song, “I’ll Stand by You,” …
&&&&
A wonderful choice of song, but ironic, under the circumstances. I did not see this, but your description has me tearing up. Earlier I was thinking, and realized that the reality of what has happened to yet another beautifully spirited young woman is just now setting in. It is impossible to imagine what her family is feeling. God bless them.
xcoastal says:
May 7, 2010 at 7:26 pm
“The ugly little lie is unless there is a change there is little chance for the victim. There is no avenue for real help. That is what has to change. Do NOT tell your friends and daughters to go to authorities for help until real change is in place. That is our mission now.”
&&&&&&
Is it time for the Million Woman March in DC? Name the date.
To Justice,
Unfortunately there are many parents who, no matter what their child does, still places them on the pedestal. I remember one time, a boy on my son’s hockey team urinated in a team members hockey bag, his own teammate mind you. Everyone knew who did it, many players saw him but his parents (wealthy individuals in the community) just said, our son would never do something like that, and refused to compensate the player for the ruined bag and hockey equipment.
I too often see parents of boys who are bullies, think they are better than everyone else just laugh off what their son’s do and say, boys will be boys. It infuriates me, and I think that (with some families, not all) the more money people have, the more entitled they think their boys are.
I obviously don’t know GHV’s parents but I think that they really did not care, the more popular he was the better, the “golden boy”. I could be wrong tho.
Couple of questions tho:
How long were GHV and Yeardley dating?
When did she first break it off with him?
When did he attack her that she went home to stay with her parents?
Who actually found the purse and could it be that they never “found” it there but discovered it in their possession from the night before then said, hey, look what I found?
Could be that if GHV was thought to be a ladies man, he could have picked up Morgan, or a group of them, to take advantage of her. Or she could have recently met him and he could be the mystery as to why she did not seem too concerned about getting back in to the concert and perhaps he said he would drive her home after a little partying that perhaps got out of hand. I may just be thinking too hard!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPG6JvjKIZ8&feature=youtube_gdata
I work near UVA, I am a male, this may be wrong of me, however this video is dedicated to those who don’t protect those who choose to not protect themselves, it’s obvious from evidence and emails that people knew what was going on in this poor girls life. From the corner to JPA, we miss you Yeardly!
Gypsy DD says:
May 7, 2010 at 6:41 pm
“He was someone who didn’t take no for an answer..obviously even with his father. He would rather brave sharks in the ocean off Palm Beach then not have his way. A petulant toddler in the body of a huge man.”
&&&&&
Funny, I’ve been reading everyone’s take on GH, and tonight decided to give my 79 year old father a call to ask his take on the situation. He said the exact same thing as you. “Could not take ‘no’ for an answer, and many more men (and some women) like him in the world.”
We see these people all the time in society. What does it take to “stop” them? Like you, I doubt a restraining order, as we know them, would have made much difference.
“People self medicate for a reason.”
So true. Where do we begin to intercede in this cycle? Gradeschool? We make excuses that kids are too young to handle conversations about heavy topics. I don’t think so. Young children have already seen so much, and are more intuitive than we give them credit for. The conversation can start at any time, and the earlier the better. We are a foolishly optimistic society. We must confront ourselves before we can begin to make change.
Hi Blink I posted re Twinkletoes today May 7th and I don’t see it awaiting moderation, no worries who knows I am running between two threads now as well keep an eye out hope it shows up
Acho excellent post and research just HAD to repost it below
So, VSP, how many interviews did you conduct today? I suppose you can give the Lacrosse coach a break (sympathies to his family), given he is grieving today, but I hope you spoke to every other member of that team and staff. Six months gone and not another day to waste:
1. Who was on the bus to Annapolis?
2. Who should have been on the bus but didn’t make it?
3. Who was supposed to play but had to sit out?
4. [I know the answer to #3.] So, WHY?
5. Did any players party the evening of Oct 17, and if so, where?
6. Where were their cars parked the evening of Oct 17 and at what time did they depart practice/their pre-scrimmage meeting that evening?
7. Who last saw George Huguely that night?
8. Who is their local drug connection?
That’s a start.
All….sorry this is long…below is a letter from John Casteen, UVA President, to parents of students….this was forwarded this evening:
________________________________________________________________
Dear Parents of our Students:
Early Monday morning, Yeardley Love, a fourth-year student from Cockeysville, Md, died in her off-campus apartment here in Charlottesville. The police have charged George Huguely, a fourth-year student from Chevy Chase, Md, with first-degree murder. He is currently in custody at the Charlottesville/Albemarle jail. This week we have watched our students struggle to comprehend what has happened. Since Monday we have been working steadily to meet their (and our own) needs to grieve in appropriate ways and to understand how such a death could have occurred in a community of young people.
We are providing individual counseling services as requested. We can provide more if you will alert us to needs that you as a family know. Please send a note to me at my email address (jtc@virginia.edu) if we can help. Because students have begun taking exams this week, we are also doing what is possible to protect our students from distractions. Media personnel became more intrusive in their approaches to students than seemed appropriate to me just as exams began. I asked for their cooperation so that students can complete their work. By and large, media personnel have cooperated, and I am grateful to them for that.
I am writing now because your daughters and sons will complete their exams soon, and then in most cases come home to you. This letter includes information about what we have done this week and advice consistent with the best experts we have found on steps you might take to support your children as they bring home their own personal responses to what has happened. Many of our students are grieving. Many are angry. Many are struggling to grasp the possibility of what they (and I) see as the unthinkable brutality that ended the life of one of their own. As I do, they see the University as the safe place that belongs to them. This death did not occur inside the University, and the address where it occurred is private property. Nonetheless, they and I consider the address part of their community—the place where they ought to be safe. Young people are strong, and our students are uncommonly strong. I hope that the following notes are unnecessary for your family. Yet I feel obligated to pass along this information. I appreciate your reading it.
On first learning that a student had died early Monday, I wrote to our students and others here (faculty members, advisors, et al) to provide the information available to us. As we received more information, we sent additional advisories. During the afternoon, the Charlottesville police released Yeardley Love’s and George Huguely’s names along with information on the charge of first-degree murder. Other messages to students announced the availability of counseling and other support for those who needed these services, and of the vigil convened by the Student Council President on Wednesday night. Along with student leaders, I spoke to the students at the vigil, which was held in the McIntire Amphitheater. Relevant documents, including my statement at the vigil, appear at http://www.virginia.edu/president/speeches.html.
Several University entities have assisted students this week. These include the Office of the Dean of Students, which took lead responsibility, the Center for Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS), and the Women’s Center. Several students contacted me directly. Many asked for help. To my knowledge, all who asked have been provided access to and time with competent professionals.
The following is advice that may seem commonsensical to some, but that parents have asked me to provide. If your daughter’s or son’s mood or demeanor seems to you different from what you are accustomed to seeing, or uncharacteristically erratic, please pay extra attention. Sensible information on signs of overwhelming grief or depression in young adults appears on the Web and in readily-available books, and I have found professionals with whom I have worked this week eager to provide counsel on what might be effective now. Common signs of depression include: changes in sleep and eating habits; increased irritability; withdrawal from others; difficulty sustaining concentration; repetition of sad or stressful thoughts; constant worry; predominant sadness; and physical symptoms, which are said often to appear in the forms of fatigue, anxiety, frequent headaches, muscle soreness, and gastrointestinal distress. I hope that you will seek help if you notice these or similar signs of distress in your child. If you sense that your child has thoughts of harming herself, get help right away. Call 911, call a clergy member, call a physician whom you know or whom a neighbor or friend identifies as capable and accessible, call a family member or trusted friend.
Signs of involvement in an abusive relationship may be more complex. I am told that they may include social withdrawal of the partner who is under duress—your daughter may deal with a problem of this kind by withdrawing from all attachments, including her attachments to family; efforts by one partner to seclude or control the other (by criticizing mutual friends, by restricting or taking access to passwords, cell phones, computers, keys, money, and by sundry tactics to control the other—behavior that may be in a healthy relationship playful or flirtatious may turn into something quite different when one partner sets out to dominate the other); frequent and intense arguing; and bruises or other marks on the body that might signal physical abuse. A person who is enduring this abuse by a partner may not exhibit whatever demeanor one might expect—may not be, for example, shy or meek. Even young women who appear socially comfortable or confident may be experiencing mistreatment. As I have, you may need professional advice now in order to understand what you see in your child’s behavior. So please be alert to these signals, both subtle and obvious, and seek professional guidance if you need it. Take action if you sense that your child may need you or some other adult backer while in or extracting herself (or himself, if that is the case) from an abusive connection.
I spoke on Wednesday evening as clearly as I know how to do about what is to be learned from Yeardley’s death and done to protect others. I talked about the reality of evil, of abusive relationships here—in a place that many students and many of us (you and I) may see as a secure Garden of Eden where young people can grow and learn without fearing harm. I urged them to remember Yeardley and her death with righteous anger, to seize on the moral outrage necessary to the work of assuring that no woman, no person in this place or in the larger communities to which all of us belong need either fear for her safety or suffer violence for any reason. I encouraged them to speak up for themselves and for their friends when they sense or experience threats to their safety; to act decisively when they see or hear about abuse or violence among their friends and classmates; to seek help (from deans and advisors, from the police, from their professors, from me) if they are involved in a relationship that becomes unhealthy or toxic, and thus threatens them.
I am asking you now to reiterate these messages or whatever seems most constructive to your daughters and sons when they come home in a few days, and to be especially alert to possible signs that your child may be involved in a damaging relationship. This concern is for both women and men. I have seen no division between women and men here this week: students of both sexes have recognized together that this issue involves them. Our students, your daughters and sons, and those who came before them, have been my surrogate family for two decades now. As I know you do, I cherish them. Ordinarily, I am able to report what we have done to address a need. This time, I must ask you to do what must be done now for your own child.
As parents of students, you belong to an extended family that includes every member of our University community. When one of our own dies—and especially when one of our own dies in such a violent, senseless way—we grieve as family members grieve for a lost loved one. Just as family members lean on each other in difficult times and rely on each other for support and solace, let us rely on each other now. Let us see to it that the things your daughters and sons learn here become and remain true in the world to which they go after they leave this place.
John Casteen
A Texas Grandfather says:
May 7, 2010 at 4:10 pm
“I will consider them cowards in the protection of another human.”
ATG, I picked out this sentence in your post, because it seems to epitomize the exact problem we face. No one these days seems willing to say “I” will consider you a coward in the protection of another human. Individual responsibility is all but nil in our society. (Sorry for the serial posting, BTW….it’s Friday, and am just catching up and collecting thoughts.)
I can remember in grade school getting into a fight after getting off the school bus. We had a retarded boy who rode our bus, physically and mentally deformed, and many kids thought it cute to pick on him. This infuriated me, and one day, I engaged one of the bullies after getting off the bus. I was not by nature a fighter, and being a girl, well it just wasn’t fittin’. But, I couldn’t stand to witness this, and push came to shove. Anyway, it seems to have been a timely intervention, as I didn’t witness any more bullying of this boy on the bus after this day. Still, being a kid, I was way braver then than now. As life goes on, and we see more, it just seems harder to find the will to stand up against injustice and bad behavior. What does it take?
Another random thought. In the 70′s, when I was a kid, bell bottom jeans were the rage, and having patches on your jeans was a statement. My cousin had a round patch that read “P.I.G. – Pride, Integrity, Guts.” I never knew quite what to make of that, and couldn’t imagine myself with such a patch. I try to envision it today. Back then, on a college or high school campus, it would have been no big deal. Today, you wouldn’t be caught dead wearing such a demonstrative statement on your person. The best we can do is a t-shirt with some lame logo of a tacky restaurant, vacation destination, fraternity or sorority designation, vulgar saying, etc. What message are we selling? We need to bring back the P.I.G. patch, with the emphasis on the “I” and “G”, if only in our hearts and minds, and mean it and live it.
My deepest heartfelt condolences and prayers with the Love family and Harrington family.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnRKpTcibQw
This is coverage of the UVA v. Team USA Scrimmage
At the 2:37 mark of this video, you see #11 (GH)giving one of his teammates a low 5 after scoring a goal.
#25: 25.osu says:
May 7, 2010 at 9:25 pm
There was a little moral in that little rant of mine. I have a teenage boy who has always had a problem with the word no and has anger problems. When he was a toddler, it was cute. In grade school, it became worrysome. Now he’s in high school and its no longer cute or worrysome, it’s downright scary. He gets in trouble at school, the school gives him 3 day suspension instead of what should be a 10 day, well, because he really is a good kid. I’ve gone to his teachers/principle/guidence counselor and they all tell me it’s “a stage” he’ll outgrow, it’s an awkward age. I had to call the cops one night when he disagreed with a rule of mine, threatened me and then ran away. They were sympathetic, went & found him, gave him a good talking to, and basically told me the same thing. It’s just a stage he’ll outgrow.
I’ve got him in anger management right now, against the advice of, well all of the aforementioned people. This is NOT just a stage. This is a PROBLEM, and why oh why can’t people see this. I am not blind, I want to find my kid some real help. What will I do if and when the counselor comes and tells me I’ve over-reacting and it’s a stage? The kid threatened to get his shotgun & shoot me, threw a handful of everything he could get his hands on at me, and stormed out the door. He’s only 16, but 6’2, 180 lbs. He’s this way with almost everybody when he’s told no, or isn’t allowed to do something he wants. And believe you me, he isn’t spoiled, nor entitled, right now he has no privilages and only a mattress & dresser in his room for entertainment. Cell/stereo/xbox/shotgun/everything is gone and has been for at least a month. Suppose to go to court this week to get his perm license. I am NOT going with him and neither is dad. What is going to happen when or if my child decides to start drinking? I’ve already drug tested him, and he negative for that, thank God.
So what’s the answer? I’m not violent, and don’t believe in violence, but right now, I keep remembering that feeling when my own dad came at me with that big ole switch in his hand. I still shudder at what it felt like just seeing him come into the room with the switch, nevermind what it felt like afterward, and it usually kept me from repeating whatever it was I had done. So just what are the answers when you are a parent and can’t find what you need. Would I have more opportunities if I had more money? I dunno the answers, but I’m trying to learn. And then I have to read where this kid, GH, has parents that can afford almost anything they want, and must have seen the signs in their own child, but chose to ignore them or worse, chose to just put their son off as someone else’s problem. And here we are, struggling from paycheck to paycheck, never knowing if hubby’s job will last thru the next week, and we’re begging for help for my son, but nobody seems to think he needs it. WTF???
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnRKpTcibQw
You also see #11 (GH) at the 6:24 mark.
First, the belief that GH stayed in DC the night before the game is a bit of a stretch. Also, despite what some people think, Starsia runs a tight ship and would not not let players drive separately to a game, scrimmage or not. Thus, he was on the bus and played in the game.
Bill, thanks for posting that, but you can actually see him right screen at 2:40 ish.
They did not stay in DC that night. The team caught the bus around 8am.
B
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=100624406651201
Westboro to protest Yeardley’s funeral tomorrow!
Lord something needs to be done to these people!
They won’t get near it. The press could not get within 100 yards today.
B
So Blink…
Morgan’s purse had a “hole in it”?
34.Rocky says:
May 7, 2010 at 11:18 pm
So Blink…
Morgan’s purse had a “hole in it”?
————————-
Did I miss something?
No.
A completely obtuse reference to something else prompted that-
No correlation
B
Justice,
I know and adore a child who sounds a lot like your son. This may be out of line or way off the mark, but I have to ask if your son has been evaluated by a child psychiatrist knowledgeable about juvenile/ early onset bipolar disorder? I never in a million years thought that kids could have this, or that a child I love would be on meds that strong. I swear, though it may (or may not) be overdiagnosed and is in no way a substitute for good discipline — but sometimes a companion to it — this is real and diagnosis of it can be an incredible difference. (go to http://www.bipolarchild.com for more info and links or check out NAMI or NIMH websites, or DBSA)
In no way am I implying, for the record, that mental illness and violent crime go hand-in-hand. I have seen, however, how frightening and absolutely shocking it can be to witness first-hand the anger of a child with bipolar disorder who is not stable. I have seen the Jekyll/ Hyde transformation, cliched as that is, where a monster sort of pops out of the eyes of a normally sweet, loving, generous child and wraps almost oozingly and constrictively around him, obliterating for a time all of the true goodness therein until it is checked with proper treatment.
I know what it is like to tell a child that while it is an *explanation* for the terrible rage and other massive waves of emotion, it is ABSOLUTELY N E V E R an *excuse* for destroying or harming any thing or any one. It is, instead, an illness, not unlike diabetes, for example — to be managed and monitored and for loved ones to help monitor so that the earliest symptoms mean re-evaluation and a likely change in the treatment plan (which, with a growing child at least, is continually changing).
I have no idea if there is a mental illness involved in these most tragic murders of Yeardley or Morgan. I do know that if there is, and it has been unchecked or excused and/or self-medicated — for me, the tragedy becomes magnified.
God bless the Loves, the Harringtons, and all others who are hurting because of the violent loss of these two beautiful, promising young women.
~JJ
Does the Dec 26th assault/vandalism incident on the 1800 block of Red Hill Road tie in with any of the “land connections”, or people, mentioned in the above article?
All I can say is… man, GH clearly didn’t see the warning sign emblazoned on the BOC Van o’ Fate: “Nobody Rides (into the sunset) For Free … *We’re hunting you down and getting that woman’s proverbial pound of flesh back, so don’t even try it, punk.* B ”
Got to admit – when I read the header of this thread’s article , my instinctual thought was, ‘Yikes – B couldn’t have meant to word the headline that way…’:
“Beauty and The Beast: The Predictable Murder of Yeardley Love By George Huguely”
Sure, I’ve read the required releases/commentary in regard to this case – including the May 3 “SB Sports” blog commentary (linked via the previous thread) on the uber-rich East Coast “LAX Culture” that seemingly rose in crescendo to this tragedy; that the signs may have indeed been there… maybe.
To assert it was “predictable”… well, that’s Balls.*
(*not illegal to display in JERZey)
But I’ll hand it to you, B – you made your case, and you made it well, and your posters bolstered It all-the-way Home-2-da-Run. I thought only newly released affidavits would make this already-horrific case even more disturbing; your courageous source (OH – and, Wisertime: I assume you’re fairly new here, plucky stranger. Judge as you may, but I can state *unequivocally* that this woman vets her sources… uh, do you?)
Anyway! this source, B – in conjunction with your overall exposé on the culpability of defeated expectations in regard to women as targets in society, well – Point. Taken.
And thanks to everyone who has since underscored her submission with poignant/pragmatic personal insights and pontifications – (yes, I fall back on alliteration when I’m I’m guilty of Writing Under the Influence) um, where were all of you when I was cutting Women’s Lib classes in college?
As always, your prose reads like I wish I could write
I thought long and hard on that title, did not even consult the editors on it I felt so strongly.
It was Bro’s before Hoe’s mentality, and if you take away the Hedge funds and just look over the damn hedge, statistically speaking alone, this kids tirades and repeated abusive and violent behavior were eventually going to claim a life.
Apparently, the mistake he made, was that Yeardley was no ho.
I resisted the urge to present the analogy of “level playing field” between these 2 in the piece because it would be factually incorrect.
Yeardley was a superior athlete, whose family comes from more “means” and less legal entanglements that Huguely’s and weathered the loss of her Father to prostate cancer her sophomore year in HS.
And well, Huguely became a little fish in a big pond but could afford the big fish costume.
While I am at it, did I mention how pissed I am that Casteen points out the murder happened on private property and not on campus? As if it matters.
All the money in the world can’t buy resurrection, and it can’t buy a time machine.
No MUCUS (thanks bearly there) here.
B
I just finshed a book,”If I Missing or Dead…” by Janine Latus. The story about her sister Amy who goes missing. After she goes missing a letter in found with that said she belived she may have compromised her safety by being in her current relationship. Sad read but also interesting b/c you see how role models (father) contributed to the cycle of abuse.
Prayers for the friend’s and family of Yeardley Love. May they find some comfort during this unimaginable time.
Also prayers for all the missing and all the murdered…especially for the loved ones from the Blink family. May justice prevail and provide peace to their families.
Handed a bag with a hole in it?
As in a player turns in a purse and the story that player tells about the bag discovery is full of “holes” and/or fabrication?
interesting…
My sincere condolences to the Love family, and all who loved their beautiful daughter.
I am so tired of seeing the same thing in the headlines or finally seeing the light after it is too late.
I know that people with mental health issues are supposed to be no more likely to offend than anyone else. But GH obviously had a problem long before Yeardley came along. We need to open the door to our Behavior Health and Mental Health treatment offices instead of yanking them off of our medical insurance.
First the health insurers took away dental, then vision, now mental and behavioral health. Somehow, somewhere the disorder of alcoholism and drug addiction needs to be seen as epidemic. LE clamping down on the distribution of illegal drugs is not the answer. These people will find other ways to self-medicate and then become out of control.
Another issue we have is that we idolize our athletes. They become untouchable and paid such a phenomenal salary that they can afford the kind of support that LE cannot. I disagree that this is a good old boys club. I think this club is made of the entitled, of not only the gobs but also the newly rich and includes not only men but women, too. A woman who has had a crime committed against her by an athlete not only has to speak out about the crime, but she is also setting herself up as a victim of the fans of the perp and the rumors started by the defense of that perp.
It is very sad and as there are many more people praising our athletes on a given day then their are people praising God or anything good, we will continue to lose our young women in droves.
If we punish a whole team for what one individual has done, we set up the scenario where the team wants to cover for this individual. Money that goes to the school is given more freely when the school has a winning season and that cannot happen when a whole team is benched. Hence, the cover up becomes mandatory for survival.
I am so sorry to see the latest victim of the Monetary Underground Cover Up Society. This infectious MUCUS has to go. By not coughing the perp up, you are infecting the whole system, just like mucus in your lungs to pneumonia and death if not treated.
Thanks again, Blink, for another enlightening article.
PS For those who complain about grammar and punctuation, my son has special needs, he may not be grammatically correct, but he has something to say. Some of what he says is rather profound. Since when did we have to be perfect to have an opinion or be deemed okay to speak out. There are plenty of people who have wonderful grammar who should keep their pie holes shut at times,imo.
“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.” This quote has been attributed to several people.
Wow Bearly-
New term officially coined- MUCUS.
Lol at the pie hole. It is so true about the athlete idolization.
B
MsLAL, you should ask your cousin, and your sweet point is not lost on me, but i’m pretty sure hippies wore PIG patches to rile the police.
lol, lol
Just got them .. Quite alright.
Will respond there, thanks for the kind words.
B
Hi Eloise and Hummingbird,
Thanks. The info in my #3 is out there; you just have to read accounts of that scrimmage.
I found it odd yesterday that the judge not only sealed the warrants in GH’s murder case, but also sealed the order mandating those warrants be sealed. This morning, news that three papers are challenging the sealing of that order:
http://www2.dailyprogress.com/cdp/news/local/article/papers_file_challenge_related_to_sealing_of_search_warrants/55942/
Very.
It is rare pre-bond and pre-prelim. I really want to see the motion to seal them in the first place.
I am glad to see they are being challenged. I do suspect it has to do with an admission of drug use and they are going after the source.
B
Happy Mothers’ Day weekend to everyone. B, I know you cherish your mom this and every weekend, and I hope we all will hug the moms we have with us a bit tighter. Gil is never far from my thoughts, and my heart breaks again for Yeardley’s mom on this morning of Yeardley’s funeral mass.
A question for Blink or anyone else knowledgeable on the subject, how long would it take to match George Huguelys DNA to any DNA found on Morgan or her shirt? Could that be why VSP is so certain there’s no connection, at least by Mr. Huguely.
I’m not a person given to speculation, but events of the past year causes concern for anyone with children, whether young, teenagers or college aged. Three college aged women have died within 15 minutes of Charlottesville in the last 7 to 8 months, all from different campuses. First Morgan (VT and deemed a homicide,) Tristan Fox (VCU probably drug overdose but cause not yet released to the best of my knowledge,) and now Yeardley (UVa obvious homicide with alledged killer charged with 1st degree murder) There’s only been one arrest. If, as Blink seems to believe, there could be a drug abuse in Yeardley’s case (not with Yeardley, but perhaps her killer,) is it possible there is a drug situation in the area LE is aware of but not able to find the source. Could that be the reason for so little comment in the first 2 cases and now the sealed documents? Maybe Morgan’s death is not directly related to the person accused of killing Yeardley, but is it possible LE now believes there could be connection to all three deaths through a drug source? If so, then I think this is a problem that is much larger than UVa, it’s a problem that affects our community and communities all over central Virginia. There’s never anything good from a death, but if Yeardley’s death could lead to getting a drug source off the street, maybe this horrible cycle will come to an end.
Sorry, but in my comment awaiting moderation, I believe I used the name Tristan. The young lady, another person who seemed to have a promising life ahead of her before dying much too early, was named Kristin.
Wait, I’m rethinking why MsLAL’s cuz would have the whole pride, integrity, guts wording on the patch. Now i’m thinking the cuz was PRO-cop, and thus differentiating his/herself from being a true hippie. (Hey, i’m just a jean wearing teenager, officer; i ain’t no cop hater! don’t bust me)